Feds should offer financial support to CFL

My new normal, whatever that means, includes the Canadian Football League. I was prepared for the league to skip a season, but not to be shut down. I like to think a shut down wouldn’t be forever, because that is one heck of a long time.

The CFL has asked the federal government for up to $150 million in assistance, according to a story CBC broke.

CFL commissioner Randy Ambrosie said losing the season would be “devastating . . . One of the things, I think, that the CFL and all of us who love the league pride ourselves on is we’re striving to be very optimistic. But, to be realistic, those kinds of losses could have an effect on the future of this league.”

I don’t think he is crying wolf. The league has had financial problems before, but those problems never seemed to reach this level. The Canadian Press cited these examples of previous financial crises:

•The league used the fees from expansion into the United States as a rescue tool in the early 1990s.

• In 1996, the league didn’t have enough money to pay Edmonton and Toronto players for the Grey Cup game. Tim Hortons rolled up the rim and provided the money.

• In 2003, the Toronto Argonauts and Hamilton Tiger-Cats met in the infamous Bankruptcy Bowl, because neither franchise had an owner.

And those of us of a certain age, remember the province rallying to save the Riders. In 1987, for example, there was a telethon to keep the team afloat. There were more lean times ahead, but now the team is the most successful in the league.

Yes, $150 million is a lot of money, but this is not a problem of the league’s making. And the league said it would pay the money back in a variety of ways.

Let’s face it, the feds have spent money in many worse ways. One example that comes to mind is the ongoing financing of Bombardier, a Quebec-based aerospace company.

It has received more than $1 billion in federal money since it got its hands in government pockets in 1966.

Times are tough, but I vote for saving the CFL.

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Wise words from Patti Dawn Swansson: “Why does TSN, or anyone for that matter, think Will Ferrell is funny? He isn’t. Ferrell pranked the Seattle Seahawks on a Zoom gathering the other day, expressing his love for quarterback Russell Wilson and saying, ‘let’s make a baby.’ Kate Beirness of TSN described the bit as ‘fantastic.’ No, it was totally lame, just like Ferrell’s gig in the TSN curling booth.”

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From Meat Blanket Comedy: “Customers at Costco will soon be required to wear a face mask while shopping. This will make for great membership photos.”

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When will talking heads on talking heads radio quit asking Ron MacLean and Don Cherry about their parting of ways? It is so old. Please stop it.

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From comedy writer Alex Kaseberg: “Isiah Thomas said Michael Jordan was only the fourth best player he’s played against. Isiah did not mention which women were the four best he sexually harassed when he was with the Knicks.” Those Thomas put ahead of Jordan were: 1. Kareem Abdul-Jabbar; 2. Larry Bird; 3. Magic Johnson. I don’t think so.

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Jackie Chan started his career doing porn. Then, he made it big.

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From Regina Leader-Post reporter Arthur White-Crummey: “Dear thieves who go through my worthless contents of my unlocked car at night, kindly turn off the lights when you are finished, so the battery doesn’t run out. Thank you.”

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I read last week that Barry Bonds is 55. That’s 47 in steroid years.

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From former football coach and broadcaster Jimmy Johnson: “RIP, one of the greatest of all time. Don Shula. He set the standard. Will talk later today on Fox.” I knew Johnson was God-like, but it’s amazing that he can talk to Shula on the day the Hall of Fame coach died.

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Comedy writer Brad Dickson, on the possibility of the NBA re-opening the season at Disney World: “It is going to be embarrassing when Snow White and the 7 Dwarfs defeat the Golden State Warriors.”

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From Dwight Perry of the Seattle Times: “U.S. sprinter Deajah Stevens has been provisionally suspended for avoiding drug testing. In other words, you can hide out but you can’t run.”

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From Sask. comedian Kelly Taylor, a onetime hockey player: “Just found (a recording of) our Midget AAA bench brawl. I was first to leave the bench. Coach yelled at me to get back, and I said, ‘why, I’m not playing.’ (It was the playoffs.) My mom had the best line when we got home. ‘Kenny, you should have come to the game. Kelly got some ice time.’”

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Another from Swansson: “There was considerable ballyhoo last week, when an extremely large Icelandic lad named Hafthor Bjornsson established a world record for deadlifting 1,104 pounds. What’s the big deal? The Cleveland Browns have been carrying that much dead weight since the 1960s.”

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From petty Postmedia columnist Steve Simmons: “If I can’t go to my gym, and you can’t go to your gym, I sure as hell don’t want special arrangements made so the Raptors can go to theirs.”

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What was TSN’s Dave Naylor thinking when he covered the CFL draft with an NFL helmet on the shelf behind him? It was distracting and stupid.

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From TSN’s Chis Cuthbert: “I have scoured my marriage contract multiple times, and understand the in sickness and health part, but nowhere can I find the clause that says I must assist my bride in her hair colouring adventures.

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Joe Thornton shaved off his beard and found Patrick Marleau in it.

-Cam Hutchinson